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• Jimmy Buffett is busted in France after customs discovers around 100 hits of ecstasy in his luggage. His flack claims that it was only 20 pills, and they were prescription medication — but Buffett agreed to pay a fine, which doesn't make sense if his stash were legal. No word on why authorities searched him in the first place, but it probably had something to do with all those glowsticks he was waving around. [Page Six]
• We wouldn't put it past Andy Dick to hit on his 18-year-old son. [Lowdown]
• Let's reiterate, for a third day in a row, that Madonna is not adopting a child in Malawi. She's just sprinkling orphans with Kabbalah water. [Page Six]
• Eva Longoria bruises a rib, which is only slightly more tragic than breaking a nail. [R&M (bottom)]