Arnold's former underage fling describes several other affairs, one of which Maria supposedly knew about. The Brangelina brood makes a "giant mess" in Cannes. Lea Michele throws a tantrum over a dress. It's TGIFriday gossip.

  • Gigi Goyette, the Little House on a Prairie actress and Schwarzenegger mistress who took $20K in tabloid-laundered hush money in 2003, hired Gloria Allred and gave an interview to the Enquirer. Years after a 16-year-old Gigi hit it with 28-year-old Arnold, the illicit lovers reunited for a 7-year-old affair right under Maria Shriver's nose. At first he said "he couldn't have full intercourse—just what he called 'outercourse,'" but by year two they were doing the ol' penis-in-vagina. Gigi claims to know two other women who had affairs with Arnold: an unnamed actress from Total Recall and an unnamed "friend" whom Maria caught and vanquished. [Enquirer, Celebitchy, E!, image via Getty]
  • Meanwhile, Radar claims to have the "real story" on Arnold Schwarzenegger coming clean about his love child: "Maria [Shriver] has suspected this for a long time and she asked the housekeeper. The housekeeper admitted it. Maria then went to Arnold and he confessed." Any minute now, Marc Cherry is going to pop out of the woodwork and announce this is all a viral campaign for his new soap opera, Desperate Housewives, Maids, and Everyone Else Arnold Schwarzenegger Likes to Fuck. [Radar]
  • Speaking of Mildred Patricia Baena, she finally took down her MySpace page. Also, TMZ has proof that Arnold paid the $65K down payment on her $250K house last year. [TMZ, MySpace]
  • Lea Michele didn't like the dresses her stylist sent over for the Met Costume Institute Gala, so she "kept saying that she hated everything—she was crying and having a fit! You would have thought Lea was the next Queen of England when you saw her having a royal fit." Please. Middleton would never pull a stunt like that. [InTouch, Celebslam]
  • Ashton Kutcher and David Blaine went to a club, and David spent the whole night "thumbing" a deck of cards. Magician : shuffling cards :: Bond villain : slowing stroking cat. [P6]
  • Angelina Jolie says the Brangelina brood is "making a giant mess" in Cannes. 4-year-old Shiloh is trashing hotel rooms and soaking teddy bears in Cristal, and 8-year-old Maddox is licking the button on her jacket more violently than usual. [Us]
  • Fred Armisen and Elisabeth Moss are officially divorced. Good-bye forever, couple that was too quirky-adorable to be true. [TMZ]

Scarlett Johansson is unrecognizably strange in a new W editorial. That's her in the clown makeup at right. [Celebitchy]

  • Christina Aguilera and boyfriend Matt Rutler went to a New York burlesque club, where they drank two bottles of wine and Christina must have weathered so many jokes about Burlesque. [P6]
  • "Thank you" crotch tattooed "psycho loose cannon" Alex Pettyfer: "I'm misunderstood." [Us]
  • 35-year-old Marion Cotillard gave birth to a son and named him Marcel. [People]
  • Princess Beatrice's crazy hat auction ends on Sunday. The current bid is $81,476.72. [eBay]