We owe you an apology. Friday came and went without a single moment of Blue States Lose, and we failed to provide an explanation. As it turns out, resident hipster hater Joey Arak was in Austin, Texas, for the South by Southwest music festival. We're sure that a few days' worth of total immersion amongst the indiest of indie folks (and assorted bloggers) will provide him with endless inspiration for his next BSL installment, which dutifully returns to form this Friday.

It may be suspiciously nice outside, but we're urging you to avoid sunlight at all costs. It's global warming, you fools — not time for rejoicing! Instead, stay chained to your desk and bask in the warm LCD glow of Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of the handicapable hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to.

Gather 'round, darlings, and come get your midday snack: apple juice, a cookie, and a hearty spoonful of Blue States Lose. It's time for our weekly foray into the inane, where we sort through the galleries of the insane and inane hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. After the jump, Joey Arak makes you smell his vintage cowboy boots.

Sent to us by a reader on a mission to make us weep, it's the most disturbing, confusing footage we've seen in recent memory: Last Night's Party, the video. We don't know if the clip is designed to be a trailer for some forthcoming public access romp or something more sinister. Or maybe photographer Bronques is just showing his trailer for, like, his fucking life, dude. Yeah. Whatever the intention, seeing the tweaky hipsters and naked children of Blue States Lose in live action has us shocked. You mean these over-calculated cracknuts are actually real people?

It's Friday, and that can only mean 2 things: you've got a marvelous hangover, and we've got Blue States Lose, our weekly exercise in tough love. We sort through the galleries of the insane and inane hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. After the jump, Joey Arak dishes his sartorial philosophy.

The only thing that could possibly improve on such a sunny Friday is Blue States Lose, our weekly game in which we sort through the galleries of blissfully retarded hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows you his MySpace profile.

Fridays are delightful, and no less so because of Blue States Lose, our weekly game in which we sort through the galleries of blissfully retarded hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. After the jump, Joey Arak teaches you how to wear your kohl liner smeared like the stars.

It's time for our favorite Friday fuckwit funfest: Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of blissfully retarded hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows you how it's done.

TGIF, whorebots, 'cause it's time for Blue States Lose, our fun little game where we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. After the jump, Joey Arak helps you with your asymmetrical haircut.

In last week's edition of Blue States Lose, we came across the following photo:

Put down your lunch and bust out your glitter-flecked black eyeliner! It's time for Blue States Lose, where we get off on sorting through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night s Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don t have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. After the jump, Joey Arak teaches you to appreciate the dirty scent of the disaffected masses.

After a few weeks' vacation, everyone's favorite Friday treat is back like your cold sore. It's time for Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. After the jump, let Joey Arak guide you through hipster hell.

Happy Friday, folks, and so it's time for Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then Joey Arak bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. After the jump, enjoy the disaffected magic.

You've had a long week, kids, and you've earned your Friday treat: It's time for Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. After the jump, Joey Arak brings you the eye-bleeding magic.

It's Friday — a cold, wet, gross Friday, even — and you know what that means. Not snow nor sleet nor an overwhelming urge to stop forcing ourselves to look at these fucked-up hipsters can keep us from our appointed mockery. Yup, it's time for Joey Arak and Blue States Lose, wherein we sort through the galleries at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. Enjoy.

It's Friday, playas, meaning it's time for our favorite game, wherein we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites, freshly-cooked and ready for consumption. After the jump, let the verbal stylings of Joey Arak guide you through the heart of darkness.

As it turns out, two of the constantly recurring stars of Blue States Lose are actually REAL HUMAN BEINGS named One-Half NelSon and Elaine Van Hoorn. What's their story? Says Elaine:

You know the shtick: Blue States Lose sorts through the photos of fucked-up hipsters posted at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so that you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. Enjoy.

It's Friday, children, meaning it's time for Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. After the jump, Joey Arak's list. Enjoy.

It's time for the latest installment of Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel (NEW!) so you don't have to. Then we bring you our 10 favorites each Friday. Enjoy.