Not angry sun nor blistering heat can hold down the dancing children of Blue States Lose. And so it's time for our weekly exercise in eye-bleeding, where we look at the silly hipsters on The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak puts ice cubes on your nipples.
No apocalyptic heat wave can keep the children from dancing, and so we celebrate them with Blue States Lose, our weekly socio-anthropological examination of the hipster borg. In our quest for understanding, we make fun of stupid-looking photos on The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shakes what his mama gave him.
You may be dying from the heat, but the real hotness is dripping from the emaciated bodies of the hipsters, who dutifully brave the rising temperatures and don their leotards so that they might entertain you with Blue States Lose. You know the drill: we weed through the stupid photos on The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows you his tan lines.
Emotionally, we're still celebrating America's birthday — and we value nothing more than our nation's independence, and our constitutional freedom to look at fucked-up hipsters on The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. Yep, it's time for some Blue States Lose. After the jump, Joey Arak models his leotard collection.
Before you pile into your stretch Hummer limo and hit the L.I.E. to Hamptonite hell, do take a moment to remember those less fortunate than you: the hipsters who cannot afford beachfront property, who must suffer and sweat and grind away on the dancefloors of this city while you work on your tan. And so it's time for Blue States Lose, wherein we look through these poor hipsters' stupid photos on The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak sticks a sparkler up his ass.
Just when you thought you were about to choke to death on the heat and humidity, Blue States Lose comes to the rescue with a refreshing blast of hipster haterade. You know how we do it: we look through fucktard photos on The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak loans you his lucky legwarmers.
Friday is good, and Blue States Lose is even better. It's our weekly exercise in discipline, wherein we do our best to not kill ourselves while digging through the hipstard photos at The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you won't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak relaxes in a hot tub full of warm, bubbling Sparks.
Mess up your hair and put on your vintage sweatband, because it's time to pay homage to the sweaty, fucked-up hipsters you've come to know and love with Blue States Lose. As always, we go spelunking through the photos at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you won't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak bathes in a tub of Sparks.
There's only one thing you hate more than being chained to your computer on the world's longest Friday, and that's dumbfuck hipsters posing like they're Gia incarnate. Lucky for you, it's time for Blue States Lose, wherein we drag our feet through photos of the fucked-up and fabulous children of The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you won't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak makes the Star Room look downright attractive.
It's not a coincidence that the clouds above Manhattan just parted, because it's time for Blue States Lose. You know the routine: we don safety goggles and sift through photos of the fucked-up hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you won't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak lets Merlin take pictures of his new boy-cut panties.
It's time to feed the sweaty hipster drones with what they love best: unflattering photos of themselves. Yes, it's your weekly dose of Blue States Lose, wherein we look at the eye-bleeding photo galleries at The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you won't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows off his shiny new badge from the Fashion Police.
It's Cinco de Mayo, and we all know the best way to celebrate: With Blue States Lose, in which Joey Arak puts down his margarita long enough to dig through the photo galleries at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey ridicules the deserving for the good of society.
It's Friday afternoon, and that can only mean one thing. The decadent joy of summer hours? Nope, not yet, kids. It's even better: The mockilicious joy of Blue States Lose. You know how it goes: As he does each week, hipster-hatin' Joey Arak fights his way through the photo galleries at The Cobrasnake, Last Night’s Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel, and he gets all Mr. Blackwell on them so you won't have to. After the jump, it's Joey's world, and we're all just visitors.
Put on your shredded leggings and perfect your party pose, because it's time for the Sparks-fueled joy and hipster-lovin' magic of Blue States Lose. Per usual, we sort pictures of young people shaming their generation on The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows you the path to post-punk redemption.
Just in time for the resurrection, our personal messiah Joey Arak emerges from his tomb to bring us the latest installment of Blue States Lose. For your sins, he'll sort through the galleries of Sparks-addled hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, the greasy people make the Easter bunny cry.
For most people, Friday means 9-5 laziness followed by binge drinking. For us, Friday means Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries of beautifully retarded hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak sprinkles his fairy dust.
Why are the children smiling? Because it's time again for our Friday fuckwit funfest, Blue States Lose. You know the drill: We sort through the galleries of the developmentally disabled hipsters at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak shows you his spirit fingers.
We know the possibility of a third life for Radar leaves you almost too sexually excited to think about anything other than easing yourself into some pert young fresh intelligence. But if anything can distract you it's Blue States Lose, where we sort through the galleries at The Cobrasnake, Last Night's Party, Misshapes, and Ambrel so you don't have to. After the jump, Joey Arak deigns to grace us with his presence long enough to fulfil his hipster-mocking duties.
