[Photo Credit: Flynet]

• While girlfriend Jennifer Aniston has been acting like a goody two-shoes, John Mayer has been a total party boy, drinking it up all night at a bar in New York. But he's also been totally domestic and whipped in Las Vegas, where the singer dodged groupies right and left to go to bed early. Since Aniston is really into mixed signals, the actress decided Mayer is "the one." None of this is going unimpregnate Angelina Jolie, Jennifer.

Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer the new Demi and Ashton? After seeing these new photos taken in Miami while Jen continues filming Marley & Me, we're noticing several similarities between her new fling with the tattooed O-face master and the queen and prince of age-gap relationship success stories. Like Ashton was, John is a young, charming, bed-hopping bachelor, and just like Demi, Jennifer is an insanely hot divorced actress far more famous than her beau. The icing on the cougar cake? Just like the Moore-Kutchers, it all started with a bikini:

You know what they say about hemlines and recessions? Well look no further than What Happens In Vegas co-stars Cameron Diaz and Lake Bell for optimism. At last night's premiere of their comedy, the two actresses seemed to be playing a game of Anything You Can Wear I Can Wear Shorter, alongside somber co-star Ashton Kutcher, who seemed to be playing a game of You Were Right, Demi. Without You I'm Boring And Cannot Dress Myself. Between the grieving Diaz and the toothy Bell, see who revealed more gam and why we're happy they did, after the jump.

It took her long enough, but the eldest spawn of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore is finally putting her pedigree to good use. Rumer Willis reminded the world of her burgeoning acting career at last week's premiere of From Within, the horror flick she's starring in, and was spotted posing for her first ad campaign for Wal-Mart's newest surfer fashion brand OP (formerly Ocean Pacific). And while the extensions she wore for the premiere coupled with the bikini body she displayed alongside Pete Wentz for the photo shoot do admittedly evoke memories of a younger version of her iconic mom, are Rumer's recent career choices really going to jumpstart a Demi-like fame trajectory? Or will she soon be on MTV's third season of Rock The Cradle?

Major names like Britney Spears and Demi Moore have memorably posed for controversial pregnancy pictures in the past, but something tells us Tori Spelling's decision to bare her knocked up belly won't stir up quite as many arguments. It's pretty simple: we don't want. While shooting her (yes, it still exists) B&B reality show with hubby Dean McDermott, the unlucky quasi-heiress made a sad attempt to imitate Demi's Annie Leibowitz shoot for Vanity Fair and Britney's uber-styled photos in Harper's Bazaar. Unfortunately, the results look more like what you'd expect from your local mall photographer as opposed to the star treatment given to glossy cover-worthy celebrities of yore. A closer look, plus Tori's explanation of why she's Loving! Her! Body! after the jump.

It's not just British tabloids ripping apart celebrity body parts; now their own trainers are turning against them to make a buck. Fitness expert Rob Parr has written the summer release Star Quality, in which he shells out detail after "fleshy" detail about the problem areas of stars like Demi Moore, Naomi Watts, and Madonna. And though the blurbs on the back merely outline the "types" of bodies each star had (hourglass, long and slender, and athletic, respectively), he delves far deeper into their Before states in the pages: "

In a moment of clearly born out of tween rebellion and defiance, Tallulah Belle Willis rushed the paparazzi shouting: "Look at me! Look at me! I have toxic blood and I use leeches to heal myself! Look at me! Look at me! I can't be a normal mom so I have to take a bath in turpentine! Look at me!" Then her mother quickly pulled Tallulah Belle aside, less-than-calmly explaining that young ladies who behave like this way don't get to visit the set of the new High School Musical.

[A woman named Demi Moore, apparently some sort of actress, outside the "Late Show with David Letterman" studios last night; image via Splash]

In case you hadn't heard, recently resigned NY governor Eliot Spitzer likes call girls. A lot. And while we're still busy casting the inevitable movie of the week, our slideshow-obsessed friends over at Us dove into their archives to reminisce on the hooker-laced pasts of Hugh Grant, Eddie Murphy and escort king Charlie Sheen, who've all been caught with their pants (and dignities) down. But call girls don't always come in the form of silicone sketchballs straight out of the Bada Bing. Sometimes they have hearts of gold and charisma as thick as the air on the 101! If they're played by stars, that is. We dove into our own archives and selected our top five films that revolve around the World's Oldest Profession, flicks that will surely be making their way onto Eliot Spitzer's Netflix queue in no time.

The Kutcher-Moores grace the pages of the April issue of Harper's Bazaar, in which the First Family of Cougardom weigh in on a number of topics, including how they manage to keep their Kabbalic faith after other celebrities have moved on to even trendier catalogue-order religions. But it's the subject of Moore's ex-husband and Rumer-fatherer Bruce Willis, who maintains an improbably cozy relationship with his Gen Y usurper, that repeatedly pops up:

We realize Academy Awards season seems light years away, but a series of photobooth-style pictures taken at Madonna and Demi Moore's A-to-the-power-of-A-list Oscars night bash have surfaced in Australian celebrity news magazine New Idea. (How they got their hands on them is a story unto itself, requiring a 28-inch dwarf to be smuggled into the proceedings via dessert cart, crawl inside the mechanized contraption, and collect the still-wet strips as quickly as they could be spit out.) In the snapshots, you can spy some of the world's most famous faces—your P. Diddys, your O.Bloomies—mugging shamelessly for the camera, usually in the vicinity of a twice-as-nutty Rumer Willis, who was allowed to join in on the fun after stepdad Ashton Kutcher offered some strong, "Yes, this is my daughter, now please step aside, rent-a-cop" words for ill-prepared event security.

With the party circuit looking more anemic than ever, leave it to the least likely culprits — Hepatitis-scare victims Madonna and Demi Moore — to throw a last-minute bash for the rudderless A-list masses looking for an Oscars night soirée. To be held at "a home in the Westside hills," the party will start Sunday around 9 p.m., featuring a guest list with "everybody on it. It gives the A-list Vanity Fair crowd someplace to go to. It will probably be pared down to where it's 85% talent, not a lot of suits." Security, of course, will be ultra-tight, with guests forced to undergo not only friskings and metal detectors, but also having their blood drawn and read by high-speed diagnostic computers. Anyone with so much as a slightly elevated LDL cholesterol level will be turned away at the doors. [Variety]

We take it back! American celebrities aren't all boors who just drink and never do anything fun and cute like play Scrabble. Apparently they play dominoes! Specifically, something called Mexican Train Dominoes. It seems that Ashton Harold Kutcher and Demi Maude Moore introduced the game to their celebrity pals, and everyone has just gone crazy for it. Penelope Cruz, who Kutcher calls a "vicious warrior at the game", has her own little dominoes parties. This is just like when my friends and I rediscovered Guess Who? one drunken night and played all into the morning. Then we forgot about it. And remain vaguely embarrassed. [Showbiz Spy]

Click to viewBarbara Walters appeared genuinely confused when the subject of cougars came up on The View today: "What is a cougar woman?" she asked, wondering aloud if Demi Moore was one. Her sassy young cohosts proceeded to school her on the subject of, ahem, older women who hunt younger men.

Oh Demi Moore, with your naughty magazine cover splashes. What does the gestating kid (that would be Scout LaRue) pictured at left in your iconic 1991 Vanity Fair portrait think about the magazine's February cover of you? How about your racy appearance on the cover of the subtly-titled V? And she thought her exit from the womb sixteen years ago would be the last time she had to take an up-close-and-personal look at her mom's vadge.

In an attempt to put an end to all the tranny talk/penis jokes surrounding Demi Moore (what with that raspy voice, the Adam's apple and those oddly masculine thighs of hers), V Magazine got straight to the point by extending their logo to entirely encompass their Spring 08 cover girl. All signs signal the presence of a vajayjay, we get it! But until Mrs. Kutcher strips allll the way down to her bday suit (what is it now by the way, 87 candles on the cake?), we remain unconvinced there's not the slightest remnants of a package down there. [V Magazine]

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are posted several times a week, so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time Mike Tyson whipped out his own camera at the Farmers Market to request a photograph of you.

Today Page Six ran two blind items, the first of which was so obvious that if you don't get it then, really, we feel sorry for you. But the second one left us scratching our heads! It said: "WHICH too-good-to-be-real Hollywood leading man and his hard-bodied wife deserve Oscars for their portrayal of a perfect marriage? They both have secret lives with members of the same sex." Hmm! Options were proposed and summarily dismissed for various reasons, until finally we came up with a list of suitable candidates. Guesses, in the form of a poll, after the jump; feel free to leave additional options, as always, in the comments.