After a two-year investigation, the Republican-led House Select Committee on Benghazi concluded that, as positioned, there was no way American forces could have reached the city’s consulate in time to save lives. GOP Senator John Cornyn, however, still has questions. Namely, what was Hillary Clinton’s involvement with Michael Bay’s lowest grossing film?
“Why didn’t we bomb the shit out of them?” a man asked me. “Why aren’t we bombing the shit out of ‘em? Give me a B-52 and I’ll go over there right now.” It was a chilly night in Texas, but his mind was more than 6,000 miles away, in Libya. He and I and some 30,000 other people had come to AT&T Stadium in Arlington, Texas—home of the Dallas Cowboys—for the outsized world premiere of 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi.
People don't really like director Michael Bay, but the most common explanation of why just boils down to "explosions." That doesn't mean they're wrong— it just means we need to go deeper. Here, Tony Zhou of Every Frame a Painting breaks down the most important visual clichés that Bay has borrowed, defined, or overused ad nauseam to create his trademark "Bayhem."
Director Michael Bay is known for adding a certain bigoted flair to his big-budget box-office blockbusters. He's been called out repeatedly for what people perceive as misogyny and racism (mostly in his stereotypical portrayals of women and minorities), and especially homophobia. The video above focuses on that last point via a montage of the several different ways that Bay has...fun with gay sexuality (gay dogs in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen), mistaken gay sexuality, effete gay stereotypes, perceived gay weakness, and everyone's favorite excuse to act like a raging, violent monster, gay panic. All are included above, which uses clips from seven movies Bay has directed and spans 1995's Bad Boys to 2013's Pain & Gain, in which Mark Wahlberg charmingly asks a group of children, "We got no homos in this gang, right?"
The highly anticipated/dreaded trailer for the Michael Bay-produced reboot/massacre of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is finally here.
When you think about terrible Michael Bay movies, you think of...well, all of them, except for maybe the first Bad Boys, which the 15-year-old me remembers as being entertaining enough. But if you were to name the worst Bay film, it'd have to be one from the Transformers trilogy, right? Not according to Bay. In a recent interview with the Miami Herald, the director opened up about the one movie he regrets making.
Madonna takes a passive-aggressive swipe at Lady Gaga. Ryan Gosling makes out with Eva Mendes. Jake Gyllenhaal snuggles a Twilight star. A wild man breaks into Celine Dion's home and pillages for pastries. Wednesday gossip is mad for madeleines, moonstruck for doughnuts, cuckoo for choux.
America's second favorite sexy doctor (after George Clooney, of course) has a new success on his hands. Also today: Did Steven Spielberg blackball Megan Fox? Plus some important NerdNewz™.
Gwyneth Paltrow gets pulled over by the NYPD. Heidi Montag works out 14 hours a day and has "shooting pains" in her breasts. Beyonce's mother is a diva. A new Miss USA is crowned. Monday gossip fought the law.
Megan Fox's "woman empowerment" rendered her incompatible with Michael Bay. Gwyneth Paltrow seeks genius tutor for children. Scarlett Johansson breaks up with Sean Penn. TGIFriday gossip.
"Money, so they say, is the root of all evil today." A Pink Floyd song once said that. But it's also the root of all sequels, so feast your eyes upon this gleaming pile of Hollywood excreta. It's the Transformers: Dark of the Moon trailer, everybody! The gang's back to answer all your unanswered questions from the last Transformers movie. It looks like Michael Bay has finally ironed the kinks out of this franchise and produced a motion picture that will deliver on every level. Move over, Inception — a new breed of thinking-man's blockbuster is in town, and it goes "BONNG! BONNG! BONNG!," too. You'll barely even miss what's-her-face. Also: Remember when Shia LaBeouf was a thing? He's totally going to be a thing again when this comes out! Mark my words. [YouTube]
So this is how former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty thinks he's going to get a few people — up to four, we'll say — interested in his presidential candidacy: Michael Bay style action movies, about everything. First there was the generic teaser, from a few weeks ago. Now he's made one in support of Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker and his union-smushin' efforts. It directs you to a website, StandingWithScott.com, which redirects you to Tim Pawlenty's "Freedom First" PAC. TPaw's one clever motherfucker, eh? That's why he'll keep making these great, apocalyptic action movies, forever.
It's no secret that Heidi Montag wants to replace Megan Fox in the third installment of Michael Bay's Transformers series, but we didn't know how badly she longed for it until now. Inside, an "audition" video she made for Bay.
The Hoff is back: A&E has picked up a reality series starring David Hasselhoff and it's gonna be huge. What do you think the show's about? Drinking? No, unfortunately. It is about his David Hasselhoff's beautiful daughters.
The TSA's looking not-so-great these days, seeing as how their uber-reactionary measures to security breaches could technically be classified as some "PT Barnum-level shit." So how do you think they react when bloggers leak their directives? Subpoenas and door-busting, naturally.
