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♦ Don't get your hopes up, but supposedly Madonna and Guy Ritchie are hoping to settle their divorce by early next week. Until then, though, we'll be treated to lots more gossip about their wacky marriage, including the set of rules Madonna posted on the wall of their Central Park West apartment and how she wanted to fill up their Olympic-size swimming pool with Kabbalah water. [NYP, Daily Mail]
♦ You think your house is complete chaos? For their stay in Berlin, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have six full-time nannies and a fleet of 20 Volkswagens (provided to them by the car company gratis, of course). [NYDN]
♦ Elizabeth Edwards, the wife of former presidential contender John Edwards, was spotted without her wedding ring at an event Monday night. Now the talk is that the couple isn't living together anymore either. [P6]
♦ Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are supposedly feuding because Ashley wants a boob job, but doesn't want to get one unless Mary-Kate goes under the knife at the same time. [Star]

♦ The always charming John Mayer told Pink that he only sleeps with "really stupid women," news that we're sure Jennifer Aniston was thrilled to hear. [The Sun]
♦ A Manhattan judge ruled yesterday that Carol Alt's ex-husband doesn't owe her any money because she waited too long to file a claim. [NYDN]
Rosario Dawson says rumors that she and boyfriend Mathieu Schreyer are engaged are false. [People]
♦ In the new issue of Vanity Fair, Seal says he and Heidi Klum will leave the US if John McCain gets elected. [LAT/The Dish Rag]
Heidi Klum's hosting her annual Halloween bash at 1OAK this year. [P6]
Bruce Springsteen and his wife Patti Scialfa have cancelled their annual Halloween light show at their New Jersey mansion because they're afraid too many people will show up. [NYP]
♦ Janet Jackson had to agree to tone down parts of her concert in Detroit because of a state law that "prohibits simulated sex acts" in public. [Yahoo News]
♦ Leonardo DiCaprio produced and and starred in some sort of PSA aimed at getting young people to vote. [NYDN]
♦ In the least likely news ever, Victoria Beckham has supposedly been secretly training for the NYC Marathon. [Perez Hilton]
♦ Novelist Richard Price and his wife Judy Hudson have split up. [R&M]
Jeanine Pirro owns an 18-year-old pig named Wilbur, who lives in his own "gated, wood-shingled cottage" on her Westchester estate. [P6]
♦ Jessica Simpson tells Cosmopolitan she and Tony Romo are compatible in "all" areas and that she wouldn't still be dating him if they weren't headed for marriage. [P6]
♦ Former MTV VJ Simon Rex is becoming a rapper. [NYDN]