Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes can't stop buying their East Village neighbors' apartments. There are two flats for staff alone. One's a gym. Everything's on a different floor. Insane. Sounds like them! [P6]
Jennifer Aniston is either back with John Mayer and maybe asking for his hand in marriage because of a> "a barrage of romantic emails from him "(Star), b> her pregnancy with his love child just like in those pictures or c> an insatiable need to look insane in the tabloids.
Michael Phelps is dating Barbara Walters' assistant "Marina," with whom he went to college. Wait, that's a fake name right?? Is someone playing a trick on poor old Cindy Adams? [Cindy Adams]
Actress Lindsay Lohan and her deejay girlfriend Samantha Ronson totes got in fight on the Acela train to Washington DC. Supposedly Lindsay, who keeps saying mean things about Sarah Palin, hissed quietly to Sam: "I do what's good for you, not what's best for both of us." [P6]
Téa Leoni, who encouraged husband David Duchovny to seek treatment for sex addiction, fell in with Billy Bob Thornton, who has been married five times and has a child with his current girlfriend. Téa became his rock band groupie and accumulated dirty text messages from the actor on her cell phone. She's now separated from Duchovny and free to track down every last sex-addicted actor on the planet. (And Neel Shah is realizing the Truth Was Out There.) [Mail]
Anderson Cooper's great-great-grandfather, Cornelius Vanderbilt, held as a slavecousin now owns the plantation where Michelle Obama's great-great-grandfather, Jim Robinson once worked. Cooper's cousin has invited Obama to visit her ancestor's grave. (CORRECTION: CNN said Obama's ancestor did not work for Vanderbilt. [R&M]
Maria Bartiromo and Erin Burnett of CNBC insist they aren't backbiting rivals. The business network said the Post created the rivalry from thin air. The Post said someone at CNBC "leaked" word of the supposed feud for free publicity and now everyone on the inside is trying to figure out who the leaker was. Which is believable, because it's not like they have anything better to do right now. [P6]
Scarlett Johansson may have sent crushy emails to Barack Obama, but that doesn't mean she can't defend Hillary Clinton against sexist political pundits in the racist media. [Star]
Three months after giving birth, 17-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears is said to be pregnant. Everyone's freaking out, "pals are begging her to abort." If only there was a national political leader, preferably experienced with teen pregnancy, who could guide the celebrity family in these trying times. [National Enquirer]
Madonna and Alex Rodriguez had a big secret dinner at Dos Caminos Third Avenue in New York. They arrived half an hour apart, sat in the back at a quiet, "alcove-like" table and left by separate exits. Then they denied the Mexican food rendezvous to the press, since Rodriguez's soon-to-be-ex-wife has the crazy idea Madonna sneaks around with A-Rod . But Us Weekly and Page Six each has a source who saw the dinner, so it's basically confirmed.
Heather Locklear's DUI bust? Called in by an ex-Us Weekly staffer who now runs a paparazzi agency. She watched Locklear get into the car, then snapped pictures as she was taking her sobriety test. TMZ paid her more than $27,000 for the shots. And, uh, for ensuring road safety or whatever. [Scoop]
Star magazine claimed Lindsay Lohan quit Alcoholics Anonymous an has been drinking, doing cocaine and cutting herself as her life spirals out of control. Lohan already called the story "ridiculous" and slammed Star's track record in a pre-emptive MySpace strike Friday.
Angelina Jolie supposedly threatened to leave Brad Pitt because he was never home at their filthy French chateau with the six kids. God knows why. [Sun]
