Lindsay Lohan says the jewelry store that filed grand theft charges against her keeps changing their story. Scarlett Johansson is supposedly diddling Sean Penn, Jennifer Aniston wants to move to New York, and Pete Wentz is getting divorced against his will. Thursday's gossip makes bad decisions.

Lindsay Lohan had her millionth day in court today, this time to be arraigned on grand theft charges related to a necklace she supposedly stole from a store. She has to pony up $20,000 bail for that charge and another $20,000 for violating her parole for a string of DUIs that she already served a brief sentence for.

To prepare for court, Lindsay Lohan gets her hair did. Jude Law and Sienna Miller break up. Kim Kardashian gains 10 lbs. on "street meat." Kevin Smith loses 65 lbs. on a diet of shame. Wednesday gossip sits in judgment.

Holy crap, it's actually happening: The AP reports that prosecutors plan to charge Lindsay Lohan with the felony grand theft of a $2,500 necklace.

TMZ is reporting that cocaine golem Lindsay Lohan, the troubled actress who's been in and out of both jail cells and rehab over the past few years, is in talks to get a major role in the new Superman movie currently in the works at Warner Bros. If this is true, it would be surprising!

Eva Longoria rebounds with a pierced pop star. Lindsay Lohan still on the hook for grand theft. Holly Madison gets $30,000 to sit next to a rich guy. Bieber's secret alias is Chandler Bing. Tuesday gossip blows everyone's covers.

While Christina Aguilera does star-spangled damage control, her handlers fret about alcoholism. Lindsay Lohan's felony grand theft charge looms. Jessica Szohr may be dating the Packers' quarterback. Monday gossip streams o'er the land of the brave.

Shia LaBeouf got in a bar fight after someone called him a "faggot." Calvin Klein's boyfriend wrongly boasts about his new car collection. Lindsay Lohan girds herself for a legal fight. Khloe Kardashian tries to lose weight. Sunday gossip roundup!

Lindsay Lohan insists she borrowed the $2,500 necklace from an L.A. boutique, but cops say otherwise. They are about to charge her with felony grand theft, which carries a maximum sentence of three years in prison.

To contextualize the allegation that LiLo stole a $2500 necklace, here's a handy guide to LiLo's kleptomania: $400,000 necklace, $11,000 mink coat, $35,000 Rolex, photo shoot jewelry, Louis Vuitton samples, her friend's clothes. Our hearts. [The Gloss]

Halle Berry's custody battle gets ugly. Jennifer Aniston could have been an SNL cast member. Whoopi Goldberg on shitting the bed. Lindsay Lohan didn't steal that necklace, she "borrowed" it. Thursday gossip has feminine wiles.

Rihanna celebrates looking sexy in a leaked sexting picture. Lindsay Lohan wears a shoplifted necklace. Mariah Carey is expecting twins. Wednesday's gossip roundup is comfortable with its body.

Ashton and Demi ignore a chorus of boos in Brazil. Charlie Sheen's rehab center is actually just his house. Glee apologizes to Lindsay Lohan. Helen Bonham Carter praises her own "huge breasts." Tuesday gossip is enhanced with video.

Lindsay Lohan gets a "tripped out effect" from sunglasses lined with flashing lights. James Franco has a sex tape. Rihanna's purported lesbian lover speaks. Montana Fishburne pretends to drink bleach. Tuesday gossip is a rave.

Madonna's brother worries about her love life. Lindsay Lohan is "completely over the club scene." Justin Bieber's toy-begging technique caught on tape. Ronnie Specter says Snooki stole her 'do. Monday gossip craves young blood.

Jim Carrey gets a new, model sweetheart. Bill Clinton hangs with Cameron Diaz. What's Oprah's big secret? Justin Bieber's hair costs slightly less than rumored. Saturday Gossip Roundup is hanging out with a big bowl of waffles.

Jake and Taylor rendezvous in Nashville—but was it ex sex or postmortem wallowing? Macaulay Culkin parties with a porn star. Jesse James and Kat Von D are engaged. Bill Clinton is Cameron and A-Rod's third wheel. TGIFriday gossip.

Nicki Minaj self-debunks. Lilo's nurse wants a truce. Kate Middleton has chosen her dress. David Beckham did not have sex with a hooker. Paris Hilton's return to porn. Jared Leto's intense driver's license picture. Sunday gossip roundup is here!

Rihanna and Nick Minaj battle for sexy dominance. Lindsay Lohan has dinner with Sam Ronson. Gwyneth Paltrow is Rep. Gabrielle Giffords' cousin. Monday gossip is full of coincidence.

Pauly D and Chloe Sevigny star in the craziest dating rumor we've heard, probably ever? Orland Bloom and Miranda Kerr have a kid. Lindsay Lohan makes peace with her new neighbor, Samantha Ronson. Saturday Gossip Roundup is taking it slow.